Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Back home - II

Continuing on about my trip…

When we got off the plane, both kids were sleepy and tired but the moment KB saw my friend L he was very happy. He gave a shy silly smile and started doing silly faces turning his head way up to the side etc. His pants were wet (he refused to let me change his diaper in the plane, how I would have done it with baby girl in hand is a different question!) so I quickly changed his diaper and clothes and then nursed baby girl and changed her diaper – all while my friend and his wife (V and L) were gathering my bags from baggage claim. They laughed at the assembly line feed/diaper changes that were happening for the two kids. I told them I would have my turn to laugh when my kids are more grown up and they are the ones changing diapers and looking like zombies from the non-stop work!
The contrast was all the more because they were returning from a wedding lunch and L was looking very pretty in her silk sari and new hair style, wearing stylish new pair of glasses. I was only glad to get through the day and get home to my friend’s place with little thought to how I looked (probably like a bag lady!) at that point!

First stop was at my friend T’s place. P was dropping me off at her place. She is an old college friend and a very close one at that. Yet this visit was a little different for me. I was seeing her in her new environment – her husband had made it really big in his company and reaped huge gains in stocks – so they are now fabulously wealthy. A gorgeous house in prime zip code and money for probably a few generations. Money can change friendships and I often wonder if our friendship is any different now because of her new moneyed status. I still can’t say for sure (just because we had so little time to really talk – between her two kids and my two kids, there was very little free time) – but on the face of it, nothing has changed. She still chides me jokingly (as I often complain to her that she does so) and was as eager as ever to have us stay at her place. I truly felt happy for her and for her husband - his success at his work and for being able to live a worry free life as far as money is concerned.
There is a strange feeling to see your friend who shared similar background to now not be in a position to relate to, or more so go through similar issues. A lot of every day issues are for example not something she has to deal with now. I can’t now tell her about not having enough time to maintain the house as cleanly as I would like to – because it is not an issue for her – cleaners come to her place quite often. I can’t talk too much about how flight expenses are piling up for us this year because that is absolutely not an issue for them. She will understand because she has been there but I just feel silly talking about it to someone who does not have to go through similar things in the same time frame. But she certainly does not wear her wealth on her sleeves - well you don’t have to in that zip code – but you know what I mean. She does not brag about her material acquisitions nor does she behave differently. Her parents – especially her mother who I am very close to, very fond of and is my role model – have not changed one bit. They don’t so much as hint in their conversations about her new status – which I have seen many parents do when their children either become wealthy on their own or marry into a wealthy family. It just feels good when you see such people – who can keep their head on their shoulders and keep their balance both during tough times (which they have really gone through) and good times.
Does money change friendships? There was this article in the NYT a while back – interesting one, incase you would like to read it.

Sorry for that digression!

Next stop was at each of my sister’s places during the Thanksgiving weekend. It was absolutely great spending time with them and their children (who are quite grown up now). KB and baby girl (I need to find good blog names for them!) had a great time basking in all that love and affection. My super smart nephew played the guitar (he formally learnt to play piano but can play the guitar and drums just as well on his own) sitting on his exercise ball while KB jumped on to the piano table and pressed the keys like he was a pro! It was quite a sight! He really looked like a junior musician – so intent and involved in what he was doing. He fell in love with the guitar and kept telling me “Daddy’ya unakku Guitar vangi kudukka sollalama?” (Meaning – Shall we ask Daddy to buy you a guitar?). My sister and I went shopping for an hour when baby girl fell asleep in the evening. It was great going out with my sister after a long long time. My sister was of course unhappy when it was time for us to leave. She had to go on call and I was going over to my cousin’s place.

I think I will post the next bit about my trip as a separate post. You will see why when I do that post. Will write when I find the next time slot!


Aryan said...

Hi noon
So nice to read the rest of the post. Still waiting or more.
KB and baby girl is good blog name..
Aryan's Mom

the mad momma said...

noonie.. i am really enjoying this series! and i love the way you meander off into little issues. i am with you on the assembly line diaper thing. you and i will have the last laugh :)

and also on the rich friend thing. i do have friends who are financially better off because they are DINKs and we are dodos. i always feel stupid mentioning how i cannot afford this or that. sigh.

Poppins said...

You're back !! I missed you so much. Now I'm going to curl up and read your posts.

chitra said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
chitra said...

noooooon was waiting for Back Home II and needless to say enjoyed reading it. Well KB and baby girl is good, dont change pls. I think KB and baby girl will be good at music - talented kids. Why dont you sent KB to piano/Guitar classes soon.

Hey thought of you noon while writing my new Song post.

Preethi said...

lovely pics... daddy a guitar vangi kuduka sollidalamme!!

ddmom said...

Oh noon, hats off to you to travel with 2 kids all alone. I have traveled just with D - 2 times all alone, first time I was not pregnant and second time I was pregnant and had a stop over. It was barely manageable.
You are brave, really!!

One more vote to keeping KB and kutti girl as is in the blog world. Both the kids look very very sweet.

noon said...

Hi Aryan - Thanks...I have been reading posts so randomly - have to visit yours soon. Kutti boy = KB here in my blog. But at home kutti boy calls baby girl "Kutti baby" (KB)! :)

MM - yeah I can't wait for the day when I can sit back and enjoy my friend's kids and hand them over to the parents when it is time for a diaper change! :)
Oh yeah there was a time when I didn't know what DINK meant! Now I am steeped in such jargon! :)

Poppins - thanks! :)

Chitra - will read your post soon. Guitar or Piano - has to wait till KB is five! :)

Preethi - yeah I think pretty soon KB will get some kutti guitar!

DDmom - Thanks! Just posted a comment on your post.
Brave - not really - had no choice - either go alone or have no time with people!

Orchid said...

...oh don't worry..soon your kids will be grown up and surely you will have the last laugh!
and will read that article on the rich and the moneyed...
now you come back soon with part 3!

Mala said...

Hey Noon..have been lurking for a while. Read kutti girl's birth story post recently, and realised she and my son Dhruv were born on the same day this year :-) I had an "accelerated" delivery too (born within an hour of reaching hospital), but nothing to compare to yours.Anyway, just wanted to delurk and say Hi :-) (and that I love your writing style)

Cantaloupes.Amma (CA) said...

I can understand the rich friend thing you have mentioned so well ... I have some friends myself. Its nice that your friend hasn't changed.
Not all my friends have kids yet ... I can't wait for the day for them to have kids, so I can relax and watch them !

noon said...

Hi Orchid - yes yes. Waiting to laugh all the mommy bloggers who will move on to child no 2! :)) And write about lost sleep! Hee hee! The "evul" woman that I am!
Read your totally amazing engmnt story!

Mala - oh my god - this is unbelievable! Same day? And similar birth story?! OMG - now you have to make this your first post! Please please - waiting to hear about it!
Thanks for your comment. I didn't know there are even lurkers for my posts - I always assume the people who comment are the only ones who even read my posts! So it's a nice surprise - thanks! :) Pl do post soon!

CA - glad to know the feeling is similar on both counts! :) How does it feel for you - the friendship hasn't changed?

S said...

Hey you :) Nice to have you back. Lovely pics.

bird's eye view said...

This is my first visit to your blog, though I have read so much about you from other bloggers. It's a nice series - and I do understand how you were apprehensive about your friend's new monetary status changing things. It has happened to me that I couldn't relate to a very close friend after he suddenly beca,e v. wealthy.
And here's wishing your cousin best of luck - can't imagine what she's going through.

noon said...

Thanks for visiting. Appreciate your comment.
I am not able to access your blog - you have one?