I should in fact title this as "Thank god for big mercies". I have written a few posts (incidentally I just noticed this is my 75th post - it could well be my 100th - I would not know since I have deleted quite a few of my old posts) on how kutti boy gives me a hard time when it comes to feeding him his meals. I felt (much as I am truly scared of jinxing it!) I should also write a post on how grateful and happy I am that so far baby girl has been so good to me when it comes to feeding her solids. SO FAR! Knock on wood! Run folks, please do knock on wood for me! :))
When my mom was getting ready to leave, I had knots in my stomach. I was not afraid of the work really - I was anyway doing most of the baby care on my own. But the biggest help she gave me was watching baby girl while I fed KB his meals. Baby girl would be upstairs with my mom while my mom watched sun TV or read her books. Another huge help was just having my mom around when baby girl was sleeping - I could use that time to take KB out to the park or to the shop with me. My mother's leaving meant I would have to feed KB while also taking care of baby girl. It takes 45 minutes minimum to give him each meal and sometimes one hour - I have made that my cut off - I just stop then. I used to feel so bugged and worn out at the end of the day when I just thought of having to go through the feeding battles again the next day. And how on earth will I find the patience to feed one more child? What if she too took one hour? I was letting my imaginations run wild...that I would fling the cup of cereal having lost my temper - like one of those vile mother-in-law type characters that I caught a glimpse of on Sun TV serials. I talked to my friends over and over that week if I should hire a nanny for a few hours and go through the pain of picking her up and dropping her off. I talked to my one friend who managed on her own as to how she did it. The difference was that she had a ton of family members within a mile of where she lived. So that didn't count in my opinion. She could* get a break if need be where as I could not. Yet another friend told me that I would be reaaaally stretching myself very thin if I tried to manage both kids on my own especially considering B comes home past 8.00pm each day. Her children are 14m apart and she followed her mother to India (for 6m) when she left! I was so afraid. My mother (while she herself is quite the worry worm in my opinion) again told me what her father would have told her : don't worry, you will find a way. God will show you the way. Another close friend's mother, a very spiritual person, said the same thing to me "God will show you the way, don't worry". I jokingly asked her if God would physically come and help me out.
And really there is some merit to facing the battles only when you need to. I worried myself sick that week as to how I would do it. If I could do it. If the children will cope. And in this regard I feel so grateful to baby girl for helping me out. Well, both the children really. KB has been very patient and accommodating when I have to nurse baby girl. I heard from so many people that the first child gets jealous and pinches the second one etc. None of that so far with KB. He follows me to the room and does his own thing or plays with baby girl while I nurse her. Only very rarely if he is terribly hungry or tired has he given a hard time asking me to attend to him right then. Baby girl - oh dear - she has been an angel so far with respect to feeding her and making her nap. I just wish I could tell her and make her understand how thankful I am to her for this. If she were to take as long as KB did when he was 7m old for solids, I would be going nuts really. She opens her mouth wide, eats quickly and when she is full she just turns away and shuts her mouth tight indicating she is done. And I stop. Game over. Simple. I just cannot even believe it - that it can** be this simple. And naps - with KB - may be it's a first child thing - I used to put him on my lap, sing to him and after he went into deep sleep, gently, slowly lift him and put him in the crib. He would wake up in 15 min or so. Start over. After some 7m of this, finally I had to do a modified Ferber treatment to get him to nap in the crib during day time and to sleep through the night. This is not to put him down in any way - he has been so supportive and amazing in his own way. This is just to show how different it is with the second child. With baby girl, I just let her play downstairs until she starts scratching her eyes, ears to indicate she is sleepy. I then take her upstairs to the crib, make her snug under her comforters, pull down the shutters and turn on the music and leave the room.
Thank you God, Thank you! Thank you baby girl for being so good. Please do continue to be this way! And KB you too - please continue to love your sister the way you do now. You have adjusted so well to this new addition to our family - I am filled with pride and joy at this. I will allow you your meal time battles just a little for having been so good to us parents and to your little sister!
On that happy note, I complete my 75th post - if such numbers mean anything! :)